At long last, the true secret to weight loss!

Expend more than you consume. There you go.

But what about -

BZZT! Expend more than you consume. That is it. There’s nothing more to it than that.

Should I do keto, or some other -

BZZT! Expend more than you consume. How is your problem. It should be sustainable, affordable, enjoyable, and should allow you to be happy and comfortable consuming fewer calories than you expend.

What about cardio vs weights vs -

BZZT! Expend more than you consume! C’mon, you wanted the fuckin’ secret, why are you making this hard? If you like to run, run. If you like to swim, swim. If you like weights, lift. At the end of the day - every day you can possibly manage - just expend more calories than you consume.

[EDITOR’S NOTE: yeah like if you wanna build mass, like muscle mass, you need to actually consume more of the right kinds of protein, but that’s now what we’re talking about.]

I am just so sick of people aggressively avoiding the basic principle that fat is stored energy, and so to remove it from your body, you need to access it; and to access it you need to operate in a deficit.

There you go, I just saved you endless money and wasted effort.